Tuesday, 16 February 2010
Happy Chinese New Year from Yang Guo and Gu Gu
GONG XI FA CAI! It's CNY again! Firstly, me and Gu Gu, would like to take this time to wish everyone a happy CNY! Wow, time seems to have flown by quickly, eh? It was just as though I was eating reunion dinner last night to celebrate the CNY of 2009 and before I know it, its 2010. Really, 2009 was a quick and eventful year, especially for me. Anyways, here's my New Year Resolution. Firstly, I shall learn to be a better boyfrn to my dear laopo Queeny and make her happy and feel loved by me. Secondly, I shall put more effort into studies and do my best for the upcoming exams sometime in June. Thirdly, start saving up money for my very long awaited driving lessons that will commence on my b'dae, 20th of May. Fourth, give everyone a big surprise on my b'dae. Oh...fuck this. I shall say it now. On my b'dae, I shall propose to my dearest baby, Queeny. Yes, baby. If you're reading this now, get mentally prepared for that day. Last but not least, I wish for everyone to have a very enjoyable and prosperous new year and of course, may good luck and good health be with you. HUAT AH!
Thursday, 11 February 2010
I, Max Loo Yan Ming, take you, Queeny Koh Xin Wen, to be my wife. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
Wednesday, 10 February 2010
Note to a stupid, emo girl
"kindbear91@hotmail.com said (1:28 AM):
baby .. i love u so much .. i love today so much .. but i dun wan u to suffer when u be with mi .. so i will let go after two week .. just wan to be with u for another two week than i will let u go .. hais .. sorry let u fall in love wit a girl that treat u bad takecare .."
If you really love me that much as you say you do, don't leave me. I'm not suffering when I'm with you. In fact, I'm actually feeling very blessed to have found such a nice girlfriend as you. I don't want to end after 2 weeks. You always say you treat me bad, but actually, I'm not that good a boyfriend to you also. My dear, no one is perfect. You say there are other girls better than you and will treat me better than you do, but my dear, did it ever cross your mind that the only girl I ever wanted by my side in Life was you? Everytime you sent me those messages on MSN late at night, I read everything. I resist the temptation to reply cos I don't want to end up getting into a quarrel with you.
When I see the tired look on your face everytime before you start work, I feel sad for you. I don't want you to tire yourself out and overwork. In the first place, why do you even want to work? It's not like you have a lot of things to buy or are in a desperate need for cash. Even if by some unforseen circumstance you are, you can always turn to me. You know I will not hesitate to help you. Listen to me ok. If you find it really very tiring to continue studying and working at the same time, just resign. Let me take care of your every need. I mean it. Or if you insist on working, let me find you another job with less working hours and higher pay. You might say I'm selfish, insisting you on doing whatever I want you to do but the simple matter of fact is, I just want to spend more time with you. Don't give me your nonsense like I deserve other girls who treat me better or that you're not pretty or whatever shit excuse you can come up in your head. I just won't accept it. Go ahead, I know you want to drop your stupid, bo liao "bomb" smses again. I'm waiting. I'll fight you till the end. Call me persistent, stubborn, whatever. I'm just not letting you go, no matter what. In this Life, I will only love you, no other.
Queeny Koh Xin Wen, I DON'T CARE HOW I'M GOING TO DO IT, BUT I'M GOING TO BE WITH YOU!!!!
baby .. i love u so much .. i love today so much .. but i dun wan u to suffer when u be with mi .. so i will let go after two week .. just wan to be with u for another two week than i will let u go .. hais .. sorry let u fall in love wit a girl that treat u bad takecare .."
If you really love me that much as you say you do, don't leave me. I'm not suffering when I'm with you. In fact, I'm actually feeling very blessed to have found such a nice girlfriend as you. I don't want to end after 2 weeks. You always say you treat me bad, but actually, I'm not that good a boyfriend to you also. My dear, no one is perfect. You say there are other girls better than you and will treat me better than you do, but my dear, did it ever cross your mind that the only girl I ever wanted by my side in Life was you? Everytime you sent me those messages on MSN late at night, I read everything. I resist the temptation to reply cos I don't want to end up getting into a quarrel with you.
When I see the tired look on your face everytime before you start work, I feel sad for you. I don't want you to tire yourself out and overwork. In the first place, why do you even want to work? It's not like you have a lot of things to buy or are in a desperate need for cash. Even if by some unforseen circumstance you are, you can always turn to me. You know I will not hesitate to help you. Listen to me ok. If you find it really very tiring to continue studying and working at the same time, just resign. Let me take care of your every need. I mean it. Or if you insist on working, let me find you another job with less working hours and higher pay. You might say I'm selfish, insisting you on doing whatever I want you to do but the simple matter of fact is, I just want to spend more time with you. Don't give me your nonsense like I deserve other girls who treat me better or that you're not pretty or whatever shit excuse you can come up in your head. I just won't accept it. Go ahead, I know you want to drop your stupid, bo liao "bomb" smses again. I'm waiting. I'll fight you till the end. Call me persistent, stubborn, whatever. I'm just not letting you go, no matter what. In this Life, I will only love you, no other.
Queeny Koh Xin Wen, I DON'T CARE HOW I'M GOING TO DO IT, BUT I'M GOING TO BE WITH YOU!!!!
Monday, 8 February 2010
2 Weeks
Is this really all we have left? 2 weeks? After everything that's been said and done, we only have 2 weeks left? Is it really 'Game Over' this time? Is there really no chance of respawn? Hais.....I love you, baby. Don't go please...How am I supposed to live without you, how am I supposed to carry on, when all that I've been living for is gone? *Sobsob* :(
Sunday, 7 February 2010
Everytime
I miss you, my baby. Everytime, I feel miserable when you're not with me. Everytime you send me an sms telling me how you wish I was there with you, I really wish I could go down to wherever you are and be with you. Everytime you say you want to hug me, I want to run down to you and into your arms, hug you and never let you go. Everytime we argue, I feel terrible that I've not done my duty as a good boyfriend. Everytime I'm alone, I try to remember all the times we had, sharing the laughter and the tears. Everytime, you scold me and threaten to leave me, I still hold on, I still dream of the the times when we were one. Everytime I feel blue and emo, I look at the pictures we took and I start to smile. Everytime, I think about you and wonder what you are doing. And everytime, since the day I met you, I have loved you. Life's too short to live without you, where you are is where I wanna be.
I miss you, my baby.
I miss you, my baby.
Saturday, 6 February 2010
Random Thoughts
My dear Gu Gu, so now that you know everything about me, what do you think of me? Perhaps you never expected this. But I'm doing what I do now in the hope of having a happier, better future together with you.
Yes, I'm not rich. I stay in a 4 room HBD flat. My dad drives the company's car. I work in jobs that most people would shun. But I have always loved you. Truly, madly, deeply. I always fear that one day you'll leave me to go for someone else. The scar on my neck, its caused by a bottle smashed against my shoulder.
My arm injury, caused by a chair swung at me. I lied to you that I fell down cause I didn't want you to worry. I don't want to see you worry or unhappy. I want to see you smile. Forever.
Yes, I might not be a good person. My dad always said a person has to be upright, honest and kind and help people in need. Yes, that probably was true in the 19th Century. Times have changed. This is the 21st. People aren't as nice as before. The values my dad always practised. Where has it got him to? Nowhere. He's just a partner in a small business that consists of 10 ppl. He has worked tirelessly, endlessly, everyday without fail, and he takes home just enough money to put the family through the month. For my dad, his life consists of work, home, work, home. Nth else. He works hard, but he takes home a meagre sum of money back. His partner, on the other hand, sits there reading comics or plays with the laptop, takes home abt 10k per month. DOING NOTHING! It's bloody not fair. Well, Life isn't fair anyways.
I really pity my dad, yet I can't help thinking that all his principles are stupid and unrealistic. When his business failed in the past, all the people he helped before, all the friends who went out with him every weekend, all disappeared. My dad was left on his own. That was the first time I saw my dad cry, alone at the balcony of our Bukit Timah bungalow while smoking a cigarette. I wanted so much to go up to hug him, (I was only 9, around that time) to tell him not to worry. But I don't know why I didn't. But that night, something changed in me. I learnt that no matter how many friends you have, how many "brothers" who swear they will stand by you through thick and thin, it's all bullshit. When the going gets though, everyone can't wait to run away and leave you to fend for yourself.
It's the same with gangs. All the talk about 'brotherhood', it's just not happening anymore. If anything screws up, everyone runs their own way, eager to save their own skin while leaving you to die. Yes, I know because it happened to me. I got beaten, got smashed with chairs, got kicked, and the 'brothers' who claimed to be there for you no matter what, not one was to be seen. I'm not blaming anyone. I chose this road. I should be prepared for this sort of shit happening to me. But Gu Gu, I don't want you to worry about me. No matter what.
Yes, you may say I'm foolish. You may say I'm moneyminded. You may say I'm evil. Call me whatever you want. I know what I'm doing. You always say I hide from you alot of things, but I don't mean to hide from you. I just don't want you to worry so much. You have enough things on your mind to take care of. You have problems at work, problems at home, everytime you send me smses telling me about the problems you face, I feel so helpless cause I don't know how to help you out without resorting to underhand tatics or violence. Your sms you sent, you said you love me very much, but if you can't take it, you will just leave. I really, at that time wanted to tell you to go if you really wanted to. Even though I love you so much, I really can't stand to see you suffering in pain anymore. Loving you make you suffer so much and put you in so much pain. This isn't called love anymore. It's torture. Hais. Sometimes late at night, I stay up and think about you. Actually, there's not a minute when you're not in my mind but sometimes, I read all your smses, and I feel sad. So much has changed within a few months. Even us. You should have noticed by now. Something is missing from our relationship. We don't seem as sweet as we used to be in the past. I really want to go back to what we used to be in the past. When our world consisted of just you and me. Before everyone else came in. Before everything changed.
I still think about the first time I asked you to be my gf at Marina Bay, and after that we would always hang out at Marina Square, watching movies, playing arcade, and even bowling. Then we would go to buy ice cream to eat and walk to Marina Bay and look as the sun set. Whatever happened to those times? Are they now, just a set of beautiful memories to be remembered or can it still come alive again in the near future? I really don't know. So much has changed. Even you seem to change. I know I have changed. Is it possible, even if it was just for one day, that everything could go back to when we just started...I would gladly give half my life to exchange for that one single day and pray that, by the will of God, that it can last forever.
But no matter what, Queeny Koh Xin Wen, I love you. Always and forever. 1314. 7758.
Yes, I'm not rich. I stay in a 4 room HBD flat. My dad drives the company's car. I work in jobs that most people would shun. But I have always loved you. Truly, madly, deeply. I always fear that one day you'll leave me to go for someone else. The scar on my neck, its caused by a bottle smashed against my shoulder.
My arm injury, caused by a chair swung at me. I lied to you that I fell down cause I didn't want you to worry. I don't want to see you worry or unhappy. I want to see you smile. Forever.
Yes, I might not be a good person. My dad always said a person has to be upright, honest and kind and help people in need. Yes, that probably was true in the 19th Century. Times have changed. This is the 21st. People aren't as nice as before. The values my dad always practised. Where has it got him to? Nowhere. He's just a partner in a small business that consists of 10 ppl. He has worked tirelessly, endlessly, everyday without fail, and he takes home just enough money to put the family through the month. For my dad, his life consists of work, home, work, home. Nth else. He works hard, but he takes home a meagre sum of money back. His partner, on the other hand, sits there reading comics or plays with the laptop, takes home abt 10k per month. DOING NOTHING! It's bloody not fair. Well, Life isn't fair anyways.
I really pity my dad, yet I can't help thinking that all his principles are stupid and unrealistic. When his business failed in the past, all the people he helped before, all the friends who went out with him every weekend, all disappeared. My dad was left on his own. That was the first time I saw my dad cry, alone at the balcony of our Bukit Timah bungalow while smoking a cigarette. I wanted so much to go up to hug him, (I was only 9, around that time) to tell him not to worry. But I don't know why I didn't. But that night, something changed in me. I learnt that no matter how many friends you have, how many "brothers" who swear they will stand by you through thick and thin, it's all bullshit. When the going gets though, everyone can't wait to run away and leave you to fend for yourself.
It's the same with gangs. All the talk about 'brotherhood', it's just not happening anymore. If anything screws up, everyone runs their own way, eager to save their own skin while leaving you to die. Yes, I know because it happened to me. I got beaten, got smashed with chairs, got kicked, and the 'brothers' who claimed to be there for you no matter what, not one was to be seen. I'm not blaming anyone. I chose this road. I should be prepared for this sort of shit happening to me. But Gu Gu, I don't want you to worry about me. No matter what.
Yes, you may say I'm foolish. You may say I'm moneyminded. You may say I'm evil. Call me whatever you want. I know what I'm doing. You always say I hide from you alot of things, but I don't mean to hide from you. I just don't want you to worry so much. You have enough things on your mind to take care of. You have problems at work, problems at home, everytime you send me smses telling me about the problems you face, I feel so helpless cause I don't know how to help you out without resorting to underhand tatics or violence. Your sms you sent, you said you love me very much, but if you can't take it, you will just leave. I really, at that time wanted to tell you to go if you really wanted to. Even though I love you so much, I really can't stand to see you suffering in pain anymore. Loving you make you suffer so much and put you in so much pain. This isn't called love anymore. It's torture. Hais. Sometimes late at night, I stay up and think about you. Actually, there's not a minute when you're not in my mind but sometimes, I read all your smses, and I feel sad. So much has changed within a few months. Even us. You should have noticed by now. Something is missing from our relationship. We don't seem as sweet as we used to be in the past. I really want to go back to what we used to be in the past. When our world consisted of just you and me. Before everyone else came in. Before everything changed.
I still think about the first time I asked you to be my gf at Marina Bay, and after that we would always hang out at Marina Square, watching movies, playing arcade, and even bowling. Then we would go to buy ice cream to eat and walk to Marina Bay and look as the sun set. Whatever happened to those times? Are they now, just a set of beautiful memories to be remembered or can it still come alive again in the near future? I really don't know. So much has changed. Even you seem to change. I know I have changed. Is it possible, even if it was just for one day, that everything could go back to when we just started...I would gladly give half my life to exchange for that one single day and pray that, by the will of God, that it can last forever.
But no matter what, Queeny Koh Xin Wen, I love you. Always and forever. 1314. 7758.
Friday, 22 January 2010
第一个100天 (The First Hundred Days)
My dear, today marks the hundredth day that we've been together. We're supposed to be happy, enjoying every single moment that we're together, but I don't think that given the current situation and turn of events, anyone is happy.
Hais. What started out as a perfect plan only ends up in ruins now. Why? Was it something I did? Or something you said? Maybe I didn't care enough about you or make you feel loved. Maybe you tired me out with all your "wanting-to let-go" smses. I tell you honestly, when you sent me the first "wanting-to-let-go" sms, part of my heart already died. The next few times you sent, somehow, I started to get this "why-must-you-do-this-to-me-everytime? I'm-tired-of-this-shit" attitude. Yet, I still tried my best to salvage our relationship. I cired, I begged, I pleaded, everything just to save us. I don't want things to end just like that. We're supposed to go on, like forever? Not ending just after 100 days. I want you to be at my side, like for life? The reason why I keep asking you not to work is so that I can spend more time with you. After my 18th birthday, I will get promoted and I really wish you will let me take care of you. And take care of you for Life. I know my job isn't really that clean, but does that really matter? Do you know everytime I see you tired after a long day of work, I feel sorry for you? Look, you work for so long hours but you see the pay you are getting? Is it worth it? Be with me. Be my woman. Let me take care of you. Let me spend more time with you. Enjoy our life together.
I really miss those times we spent together. Before everyone else came into the picture. I wish I can rewind time back to when we just started. When the world consisted of just you and me. Us going to the movies together, us eating ice cream together and getting it all over our mouths and end up kissing each other, me sending you home late at night, us playing games at the arcade, us bowling, us going picnic at Vivocity, there's just too many things we did to be listed down here. Hais. If only I could turn back time. Now at this moment in time, I just want to tell you this. We're supposed to be meant for each other. We're supposed to go on, forever. But if you really are tired (Honestly, I hate to say this) but if you really only suffer when you are with me, then I will let you go. I love you baby. So much. But if being together only makes you suffer, I'd rather you leave me and live your life happily. I'm sorry for loving you. I want to ask you for another chance, but I think I've asked for too many chances already. Whether or not we will have tomorow, the desicion lies with you. Think about it. Sms me when you have done thinking. To be, or not to be? That is the question.
I love you, Queeny Koh Xin Wen. Take care.
Hais. What started out as a perfect plan only ends up in ruins now. Why? Was it something I did? Or something you said? Maybe I didn't care enough about you or make you feel loved. Maybe you tired me out with all your "wanting-to let-go" smses. I tell you honestly, when you sent me the first "wanting-to-let-go" sms, part of my heart already died. The next few times you sent, somehow, I started to get this "why-must-you-do-this-to-me-everytime? I'm-tired-of-this-shit" attitude. Yet, I still tried my best to salvage our relationship. I cired, I begged, I pleaded, everything just to save us. I don't want things to end just like that. We're supposed to go on, like forever? Not ending just after 100 days. I want you to be at my side, like for life? The reason why I keep asking you not to work is so that I can spend more time with you. After my 18th birthday, I will get promoted and I really wish you will let me take care of you. And take care of you for Life. I know my job isn't really that clean, but does that really matter? Do you know everytime I see you tired after a long day of work, I feel sorry for you? Look, you work for so long hours but you see the pay you are getting? Is it worth it? Be with me. Be my woman. Let me take care of you. Let me spend more time with you. Enjoy our life together.
I really miss those times we spent together. Before everyone else came into the picture. I wish I can rewind time back to when we just started. When the world consisted of just you and me. Us going to the movies together, us eating ice cream together and getting it all over our mouths and end up kissing each other, me sending you home late at night, us playing games at the arcade, us bowling, us going picnic at Vivocity, there's just too many things we did to be listed down here. Hais. If only I could turn back time. Now at this moment in time, I just want to tell you this. We're supposed to be meant for each other. We're supposed to go on, forever. But if you really are tired (Honestly, I hate to say this) but if you really only suffer when you are with me, then I will let you go. I love you baby. So much. But if being together only makes you suffer, I'd rather you leave me and live your life happily. I'm sorry for loving you. I want to ask you for another chance, but I think I've asked for too many chances already. Whether or not we will have tomorow, the desicion lies with you. Think about it. Sms me when you have done thinking. To be, or not to be? That is the question.
I love you, Queeny Koh Xin Wen. Take care.
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